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Vocations Stories. . .
My Vocation Story
by Sr. M. Claudia, from the Carmelite Sisters of the Divine Heart of Jesus
I grew up in an average Catholic family. But due to family circumstances, for some reason my family's faith got sort of lost by the wayside towards the end of my grade school years. I went to an academically challenging, all-girls, Catholic, college-preperatory high school. God was not really a part of my life; I still believed in God and considered myself a Catholic, but attendance at Sunday Mass was becoming a rarity in my family and I never really prayed. Yet from the earliest days of high school I could see that there was more to life than boys and homework and music and going out on the weekend. So to try to fill up that void, I immersed myself in all kinds of interests: politics, underground culture, intellectualism, etc... I didn't know what I wanted at all. For example, my freshman year in high school I dyed my hair a permanent bright green...and I also joined the Young Republicans. What a paradox. None of this really satisfied me, but I didn't know what else to do.
Then my sophomore year, a friend of mine invited me to go on a Life Teen retreat at her parish. I absolutely did not want to go on this retreat, but after a sufficient amount of pestering, I agreed to go just so she would leave me alone! It was while on this retreat that my life completely changed. God touched me deeply; He showed my the truth about life, the Church, and His love for me. I was knocked off my feet. I do not know why He did this. I was not looking for Him, but He came looking for me, and I am so thankful.
I came back from that retreat a different person! From that weekend on I never missed a Sunday Mass. I attended prayer group every Wednesday, I went on several retreats a year, and even began leading them. I was praying everyday, going to confession at least once a month, and even sharing some of my faith with my friends. I wish I could say that I also stopped doing a lot of the dumb things teenagers do, but I am a weak human being, and I still had a lot of improving left to do!
A few months later, during a talk on vocations at a Life Teen Mass, I suddenly had a thought that perhaps I could be a sister. This was the first time I had ever thought such a thing. But after that night, the thought would not go away, no matter how much I ignored it, dismissed it, or tried to reason it away. But even though I would never have admitted it at the time, I really sort of liked the idea of becoming a nun. Our parish had a monthly support group for people discerning vocations, so I began attending this support group. It was through this group that I found out about a retreat being held by the Carmelite Sisters of the Divine Heart of Jesus. I attended this retreat, and again, God overwhelmed me. Only this time, He spoke to me very softly, with a whisper and a gentle tug at my heart. By the end of this retreat, I knew I was supposed to be a sister, so that very weekend I became a candidate. But I was still only 16 years old! I had to wait two whole years. For those two years I went through a lot of ups and downs. One day I was sure I was entering the convent, the next day I wasn't! I dated, applied to colleges, and continued being a normal high school student. I still did a lot of stupid things, but I also did a lot to increase my faith. I also maintained regular contact with the sisters. And when time came at the end of my senior year to make a decision on what to do with my life, God gave me the grace to accept His call. Six months after I graduated, I entered the convent.
Read our feature on the Carmelite Sisters of the Divine Heart of Jesus
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